"Are you ok?"

"Are you ok?" I laughed and said "Yea..I am!" I don’t know why I always lie when someone asks me that question. Or even to myself, for that matter. I know I'm not OK!. I am missing something in my life.Some thing that i dont know . I've become someone else.My habits have changed.My routines..My tastes..Everything..But! I'm not happy.And i know I'm showing some sort of disrespect- if thats the word, to my friends,my parents,relatives and to all.Now i have no time to care them.I used to hangout at my friends places.I used to read a lot. Tv was the thing i hated the most! I used to be online 24 hours a day. I was reachable to my friends. And now..Dont know what happened to me...but ... something ...something i wanted to be with me for ever is missing..I'm not a loyal friend any more...I try to be lonely for most of the time...Some how i learned to sleep....No time for reading...No time for being online ... No time for an outing with my friends...Now i reach home right at 5' o clock....no first shows any more... And now i started watching TV-which i hated most!! And its 8 am..... and i'm awake! something which is unusual within past 6 months.. My parents are worried about me now... They noted the change in me. No longer i argue with my dad for getting my pc...He can now use as much as he like.. Whenever I was bad, I was afraid my mother would cry. And that was so much more effective that any fear that she would be angry. So I tried to be good.But now..i dont care it.. i tried to be bad ...I know my parents don’t know what a blog is. And they will never read this. So I can safely say what I feel.I feel sorry ... but i cant express it..Dont ask me Why! I'm like thaat..misterious..and lonely....... I hate this life..I want to be the gud old srijith..who cared his friends..who have time for everything under the sky...who luv to be online for ever.. who read a lot.... who luv his parents..and over all..i dont want her to feel lonely...i wanted to be with her mentally in most needed times...so..from now on i'm alive! i'm back to life..and if u ask that question again.."Are you ok?" , i wish i wont need to lie! I AM OK!